Strengthened by faith...

With a season of many changes ahead of us, it is often easy for me to get a little panicked about what is to come. Will we be able to find the right church that feels like home, find the perfect jobs, find the right home, will I find time to finish school and further my career, all the while (and more importantly) caring for my infant son? Those are all questions that run through my mind on a daily basis. Most days I try to push them aside other than when we are praying about it...because I do not want to allow fear to creep into my heart and stop me from taking leaps of faith. What a boring life that would be. However at the same time we want to be sure we are following GOD's lead, not our own. It is such a fine line to balance on...sometimes it can be a frustrating process figuring out exactly what GOD is calling you to do.

Yesterday while reading my bible, I stumbled across this verse...

(Talking about Abraham)"Yet he did not waiver through unbelief regarding the promise of GOD, but was strengthened by faith and gave glory to GOD, being fully persuaded that GOD had the power to do what he had promised" Romans 4:20-21

Found this one a little while back when we really started considering our move...

"Commit to the LORD whatever you do and your plans will succeed" Proverbs 16:20

Another verse from yesterday, "It was not by the law that Abraham and his offspring received the promis that he would be heir of the world, but through righteousness by faith" Romans 4:13

This one was also from a while ago when we started to pray about this specific decision..."Whatever the righteous desire will be granted" Proverbs 10:24

...so even on days when it all seems overwhelming, I'm choosing to believe that with faith, hope, and lots of prayer, GOD will show us the way and continue to bless our lives. :)

His presence...

Something I still have to remind myself of daily...

"GOD doesn't promise us that there won't be hard times, his promise is that he will be there with us when they come"

Love Comes Softly

***hopefully I didn't butcher that quote too much***

I've never been good with words...

but if I was...this is what I would have said.

http://wingsbirthday.blogspot.com/

I can honestly tell you that I do not know how my friend is being so strong. I love the LORD with all of my heart but to lose your child and still keep a positive attitude, to pick up the pieces of your broken, aching heart and try to keep living the life he's given us...that takes a strength I just can't imagine. Before I finally was able to get pregnant, I used to get so sad because I felt like I would always be missing the best part of life...it felt so lonely and it hurt so much to watch other women be able to get pregnant so easily...(we never really spent a great deal of time or effort talking about it with many people because it was much easier to just say we weren't ready yet...so many didn't even know we were having trouble)but now that I'm weeks away from finally giving birth to our own son and knowing the love we have for him...feeling that anticipation and excitement of his arrival. The beauty of every little kick and punch and hiccups...I wonder...what's worse...the pain of never knowing what it's like to carry your child, or to carry him for nine glorious months and have him ripped from your arms two weeks after his birth. My heart hurts for my friend in a way I do not have the words to describe. We joked that maybe someday our boys would be able to play and run together...and now that won't happen. What hurts even more is knowing that my pain doesn't even come close to comparing to hers...yet she is so very strong...her faith unshaken...even in the midst of all of this darkness and pain she is chosing to be a strong woman of faith, trusting GOD's plan for Ewan's and her life. I admire that. I hope that if anything like this ever does happen to us that Josh and I would be able to live out what we say we believe in the way that she and her husband are! If you pray, please continue praying for them...now more than ever, they need prayer...they have such a long road of healing ahead. I pray with everything in me that GOD will continue to bring them peace and hope.

JOY...

Jesus first

Others second

You last

I have no idea where or when I found this but I have had it for a long time, the other day it fell out of one of my books when I was cleaning. I thought I'd share...

Hope so far everyone is having a great week!

One and a half days until I get to see this little miracle wiggle around in my tummy! I'm so nervous because twins run in Josh's family and I'm still adjusting to the thought of having one baby...but I'm so excited! No matter what happens...we are blessed and thrilled to finally become parents.

I am still very humbled that GOD gave us this chance. I truly was not sure that it was ever going to happen this...while I hoped I'd get to experience pregnancy...I had managed to be at peace with the fact that no matter which way we'd create a family, it was special and part of GOD's perfect plan. It seems that when I finally stopped questioning GOD's will and timing and just trusted that it was perfect...our little miracle happened (and even if we hadn't gotten pregnant...it was still a great feeling to be at peace with GOD's will for our lives). Sometimes the only thing standing in our way is ourselves.

I think about how all of this came together and the timing, I definitely wouldn't have planned the last 5 months the way they played out...in January I was heartbroken that all of my hard work in school was basically useless....once again. I didn't have any idea what I would do or how this would ever work out. I certainly at that point didn't think "now would be a GREAT time to get pregnant" lol....jobless, majorless, confused mess. It makes me laugh now. I look back and I realize...everything is slowly coming together and though I still can't really see how GOD will make it all work in the future...I can certainly see that everything that has happened in the past....happened for a reason and he's taken care of us through it all :0)

Faith and Hope and Trust are all things we learn through perserverance...I don't know of anyone out there to whom these things come naturally. It's human nature to doubt, fear and not trust anyone but ourselves. Once we learn them though, it's amazing what they can do!

I'm sorry that I'm still so absent in the blogging world. I love you all dearly and think of you often. Everything has been good, but very busy. As I've mentioned, when I am home...I'm still pretty tired (and sick a lot too....but no worries....)although while you're going through it, you really don't feel like it...it's an honor to be able to experience it all. I'm not complaining by any means. I am, however, ready for that second trimester feel-good feeling ;0)